Friday, December 23, 2011


Ok so I have been pretty perfect when it comes to eating this week. I did go out and drink on Tuesday but I only drank vodka/Diet Coke and I didn't grub afterwards. This morning I got on the scale and I am 170 EVEN!!! (I weigh myself about 3 or 4 times and take the average weight so I ended up deciding that I am 170.2, but the FIRST weight was 170 even). Oh happy day!! I have the day off today for Christmas break so I work with my trainer at 10 this morning. Talk about a serious motivator!!

Also, I was proud of myself last night as well. My co-workers invited me to happy hour since it was the last work day before Christmas and I really wanted to go. However, I didn't work out on Wednesday because I was hungover from Tuesday and I promised myself that I would work out on Thursday. I was seriously torn about what I was going to do. I knew that there was no way I could only go for "just one" drink. And I knew that if I had more than one drink I would NEVER work out. So then one of my co-workers (who also was not going to happy hour) said "Well, no one regrets going to the gym." She was right. So, I got in my car and left the scene. We will probably go to happy hour next week, but I am glad I was able to say no so that I could go work out instead. :-) Being at this weight is giving me motivation not to pig out at Christmas this year!!

OHHHHHHHHH.... one more thing. Can I just say that not only are my clothes beginning to fit me better, etc etc, but they are actually fitting me differently???? Case in point: I have this pair of black pants I bought at Charlotte Russe a couple years ago. They are size 10R. When I bought them, I could fasten them and everything but (and I am sorry if this is TMI) I had a slight problem. In addition to saying "No" to Fluffy, we women need to say "No" to Toe. Yes, ladies, these pants were a problem. I was CONVINCED that the pants at Charlotte Russe just werent made for my body structure. I mean, I was a size 10 (sort of.... they were tight) but clearly, these pants were not wearable!! So anyway, flash forward to now, with all of the working out and dieting (I NEVER used to work out... my muscles are non existant) my body is not just slimming down. It's actually changing its structure if that makes any sense! I put on the Charlotte Russe pants and, lo and behold, no toe! They are still a little tiny bit snug, but I can fasten them with no straining, heaving or panting. I do not have muffin tops hanging out. The pockets do not bulge as I wear them. I am quite impressed and may even wear them to work one of these days! The moral of the story is: Lifting weights and working out isn't actually that bad!!!!

Now if I can just get up off my ass to do cardio. THAT is my biggest stumbling block at this point. I do NO cardio. I wonder if my trainer is going to get wise. :-/

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Numbers Don't Lie...

I officially ended my 2nd week of training and we took my measurements, weight, and body fat percentage. My weight is about the same as it was last wekk. In all fairness, this is probably due to the pizza i ate on Tuesday night. Yes, I know.... I was unable to say no to Fluffy. (But, in all fairness to me, I simply HAD to try Domino's new cheese stuffed breadsticks, and if you order them with a medium pizza, it only comes out to $13!!)

Despite my weight staying the same, I have officially lost 1.6% body fat since last Friday! Woo hoo!!!!! I am well on my way to being a non-fluffy member of society!

Monday, December 5, 2011

I survived....

Had my first night with my trainer... and it wasn't so bad! Granted, the first 30-35 minutes we were doing paperwork, taking measurements, etc and then we spent only about 20-25 minutes doing weights, but it wasn't so bad! I have a bad feeling that I am going to be hating him in a couple days when I actually spend a whole hour with him working out, but tonight I am counting my blessings.

The interesting thing is that I had a HORRIBLE day at work. Like, the WORST day in MONTHS which culminated in tears in front of two co-workers/friends. If I didn't have an appointment with a trainer, I know what I would have done. Come home, poured a VERY stiff vodka-Diet Coke (the Diet Coke is really only for color), thrown on a mindless comedy, and proceeded to get sloshed. Then, I would have had a drunken argument with myself about the virtues of ordering 2 medium pizzas from Dominos. Not that I can eat two medium pizzas in one sitting, mind you, but 2 mediums are only 5.99 each! What a deal! And, let's be honest, to a depressed, drunken fluffy girl, 2 medium pizzas will surely cure all the woes of an otherwise horrid and misbegotten day! However, thanks to the appointment with the trainer, I did not do this. Instead, I had a grilled chicken breast while I sat in front of an episode of South Park. Then, after coming back from the gym, I had a dark chocolate protein shake (my trainer said this would help with the inevitable soreness).

One of my friends said the exercise would make me feel better about my crappy day. Well, she was wrong. I still had a crappy day and I truly believe "endorphins" are a myth reserved by stick insect creatures who claim that they get "high" off of working out. Weirdos! But, undoubtedly, I made a better decision by working out. Neither working out nor getting shnockered changed anything about my otherwise horrible, wretched day, so, at the end of the day, I am trying to be proud of the fact that I made the better decision. Maybe it will hit me tomorrow. Tomorrow morning, I will only have to deal with the memory of a shitty workday as opposed to the memory of a shitty work day in addition to my perpetuation of eternal fluffiness.

I don't work out with my trainer tomorrow, though, so hopefully I don't have a crappy day tomorrow. Otherwise, I may just say "yes" to that double date with Mr. Stolichnaya and Mr. Domino. :-/

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Look ma! I'm still fluffy!

Ok so 3 weeks after my first post in which I promised to exercise, eat healthy, and generally not be lazy, I am still fluffy, not eating as healthy as I should, and being lazy. I got sick and was down for the count for a couple of weeks, and then Thanksgiving happened followed by my first vacation in 2 years. I got back on Tuesday, and have been playing catch up all week.

HOWEVER, during that time, my fluffiness and my desire to remove the weight was never far from my mind. I bought the book "Body for Life for Women" which I HIGHLY recommend. It does help you keep the motivation needed for weight removal, eating right, and exercising. Of course, it's very easy for ME to say that since I have been maintaining my fluffiness. Hopefully, once I keep trying to exercise and eat right I will stay motivated.

So, this weekend, I took my motivated self and bought some new work out gear and running shoes! After that, I got all dressed up in my cute little outfits, went to the gym, and signed up with a personaly trainer! I start with him tomorrow night! After that, I worked out. Granted, it was only for 20 minutes and I thought I was going to pass out and die of a heart attack, but I burned 270 calories on the elliptical.

My friend told me that the first 3 weeks of consistent working out is the HARDEST. Moreover, if you can make it past the first 3 weeks of consistent working out, you should be able to keep doing it. I sure freaking hope so! And the great thing about having a trainer is that I will be FORCED to actually go to the gym and haul ass because I have a big, muscley guy who is keeping me accountable, weighing me, and taking my measurements. Talk about EMBARRASSING!!!!! Funny thing is I am actually PAYING for that shit. Whatever... if it gets me fit and trim and toned and not flabby, I guess it's worth it.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Ode to My Fluffy Self

I had a T-shirt when I was 12 that had a fluffy bunny on it, and it said "I'm not fat. I'm just fluffy." For years, that was my motto. I would always come up with excuses for being overweight. Example: "Marilyn Monroe was a size 12!" and "Skinny chicks are always cold!" and "Yeah I buy my clothes at plus sized stores, but I am the smallest size available at the plus sized stores. So, I am actually OK." And then it all changed when the comedian Gabriel Iglesias started doing his standup routine about "fluffy". My reaction was "Shit. I gotta turn fat guy off and hit up the gym."

That was 5 years ago. In 5 years I have made a lot of progress. I went from 225 pounds to 175 rather quickly. Then I went up to 195 pounds, down to 175, up to 193, and back down again to 175 pounds. Everytime I hit 175, I think "Wow!! Check ME out! Don't I look like a hunk of all right?" and I again sink back into my excuses. "Marilyn Monroe was a size 12, and I am a size 10-ish depending on the brand! Take THAT, 50's icon!" and "Who wants to look like Jessica Biel anyway?! That chick needs a pork sandwich!" and "I can buy jeans at American Eagle! Who CARES if my size is on the very bottom shelf, tucked away in the back with the label 'Size 10-12' hidden from view from everyone else as if it were a dark, dirty secret?"

Ahh yes... the same old excuses game that every chubby chick plays, and why not? It's easier than dieting, easier than going to the gym, and WAY easier than thinking that we have problems. So, granted... I am very proud of the fact that I have lost 50 pounds and kept it off. However, I have clearly not gotten over the routine of "Just let me see how far I can bullshit myself."

So, inspired by my good old friend Katie, I have decided to keep a blog detailing my ongoing, final lap of saying "Adios!" to my faithful fat. My fat has been with me since time immemorial, but it's finally time to take the sucker off of life support. I have 25 pounds to lose. The first 50 I was able to lose with barely any exercise. I hate exercise. HATE IT. I hate it more than Jerry Sandusky hates a night away from 10 year olds. But I have realized that even once I get down to my goal weight, I am still going to look fluffy if I have no lean muscle. Therefore, I have no choice by to burn fat at the gym, tone my muscles, and continue on the hungry quest of saying "No!" to fluffy.

As such, I will do my best to keep this blog abreast of details, losses, gains, successes, and failures. Hopefully, there will be more successes than failures, but ultimately it doesn't matter. I am sick of this jiggly fluff I got going on, and I am determined to eradicate it once and for all! I want 175 to be a number of the past like 225 and 195. And I intend to start right.... NOW! :-)